"You want me to tell Uncle Harry that it was YOU that blew up the broom shed? DO YOU?"
i grew up in a big family, the weak don’t survive
Do you ever just like flex your foot wrong and it cramps and you’re just like this is it, this is how it ends
Coach Finstock in “Muted”
i logged into twitter for the first time in a year because i was curious how many people spelled doughnuts as dognuts
Anonymous said: the weirdest thing i can think of is when my friend was on her rp blog for aph america and someone asked "do you like hamburgers" and she responded with a lengthy description of how good it felt to rub the oily buns all over their body and im still laughing
I have a friend that does weird rp’s in the middle of the night I woke up once at like 3AM and the first thing I saw was an rp about dragon dildos
yo fuck samsung users with the weird whistle text tone if I hear that one more time I’m going to drop kick your android into a lake
- Bro 1: bro let's get matching anchor tattoos
- Bro 2: why bro?
- Bro 1: so our broship doesn't float away
- Bro 2: bro..
i would be more into 50 shades of grey if it were actually about
- the history of black and white film
- trying to find the perfect lampshade for your monochromatic living room
- a very elaborate knitting project
- a guy named grey with 50 pairs of sunglasses